AS IN--
there are hardly any words to truly convey all the emotions experienced today. heaping plates of spiritual food. my brothers are now reallyyy my brothers. its sometimes overwhelming seeing the changes in someone; such genuine smiles and sentiments. AHHH, it's crazy. its so wonderful celebrating with people things that are worth celebrating. oh that doesnt make sense, oh you dont get it ! most people dont. as in, most in the world. or all of the world. majority of the world! mannnn
SO WHAT THEN?! IM GETTING OLD OR WHAT?! --i can picture mahina saying that. i mean, im saying it, but im saying it the way mahina would. im saying this cause i think its a sign of maturity when you can see things from your parents' view. as in, im looking at all of my little brothers and sisters making such wonderful progress. as in, like having good goals and sticking with good friends with similar goals. as in, encouraging ME to do more; more FULLY. so yeah, i got all of these spiritual siblings, and we have such a good time doing whatever. field, or just like, laughing, talking, beaching, hanging, play-cards'ing, pooling, and blahblah'ing. and so i see them and i get scared sometimes too. like, 'dont mess up ok, guys? lets just do everything right together, k guys?' i never understood before, but i guess now i do. theres this fear where you just wanna protect them from everything. i wanna homeschool them myself, screen their calls, give them talks and mini lectures at every possible moment and just make sure that nothing happens. but then you cant, right? cause they gotta do things themselves and learn themselves and grow in appreciation themselves. sometimes words dont even help and its so frustrating when its in one ear, out the other. so you just gotta do everything by example, right? just do right and hope they do the same. and hope you taught em right. but then youre still worried but also proud of them cause every good decision they make just instills within you confidence in them. thinking of everything, it hurts a lot to lose someone. these are just plain words, cause i cant find the right ones. it hurts when something is so incredibly real to you...and when see others acting contrary to what you know is right. like when youre growing in appreciation but at the same time youre watching those you care about drifting away. which is why i worry; which is why im glad my friends now dont give me reason to worry; which is why i hope they never make me worry; which is why i'd never want to give them reason to worry. anyway, i hope everyone can see how much i love my friends. even my younger friends, who i think are in so many ways, cooler than me. some not as cool as me, but c'mon nowww; that's hard to be. even friends that are so far away but are there in mind and spirit. the one that i know is doing good; the one i always pray for. its really true that nothing compares to this brotherhood. you probably dont understand, but thats ok cause most dont.
SO WHAT THEN?! IM GETTING OLD OR WHAT?! --i can picture mahina saying that. i mean, im saying it, but im saying it the way mahina would. im saying this cause i think its a sign of maturity when you can see things from your parents' view. as in, im looking at all of my little brothers and sisters making such wonderful progress. as in, like having good goals and sticking with good friends with similar goals. as in, encouraging ME to do more; more FULLY. so yeah, i got all of these spiritual siblings, and we have such a good time doing whatever. field, or just like, laughing, talking, beaching, hanging, play-cards'ing, pooling, and blahblah'ing. and so i see them and i get scared sometimes too. like, 'dont mess up ok, guys? lets just do everything right together, k guys?' i never understood before, but i guess now i do. theres this fear where you just wanna protect them from everything. i wanna homeschool them myself, screen their calls, give them talks and mini lectures at every possible moment and just make sure that nothing happens. but then you cant, right? cause they gotta do things themselves and learn themselves and grow in appreciation themselves. sometimes words dont even help and its so frustrating when its in one ear, out the other. so you just gotta do everything by example, right? just do right and hope they do the same. and hope you taught em right. but then youre still worried but also proud of them cause every good decision they make just instills within you confidence in them. thinking of everything, it hurts a lot to lose someone. these are just plain words, cause i cant find the right ones. it hurts when something is so incredibly real to you...and when see others acting contrary to what you know is right. like when youre growing in appreciation but at the same time youre watching those you care about drifting away. which is why i worry; which is why im glad my friends now dont give me reason to worry; which is why i hope they never make me worry; which is why i'd never want to give them reason to worry. anyway, i hope everyone can see how much i love my friends. even my younger friends, who i think are in so many ways, cooler than me. some not as cool as me, but c'mon nowww; that's hard to be. even friends that are so far away but are there in mind and spirit. the one that i know is doing good; the one i always pray for. its really true that nothing compares to this brotherhood. you probably dont understand, but thats ok cause most dont.
CHEESEFESTS and whatnots. these pictures kinda suck but yeah; love you guys so much, it sometimes hurts.
i love it!
1 comment:
Mang!!! You are soo WAY! I miss you guys gripaa! Edmond and Dylan will do well, garans! hahah like that's grounds for reassurance, but seriously, look at the brothers and sisters they can look up to! including you! MENTO!!! Why do I know what you mean by the whole parental/protective/hypocrytical caretaking? I want to give it to a select few but like, cannot do doze! lol. your words were just right, as always. there must have been plenty crying and lovin today lol i'm sorry i missed it, like, meaning, i'm sorry for MYSELF! hahaha love you like a mango.
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