heavy

google image, woots !
posted is probably the most fitting image for my heart.
my cup runneth over
in light of where my head and heart has been during the last few months, this is the most fulfilled ive ever been. i cant believe ive grown to have the most wonderful friends ever. those with the same values and goals in life; a rarity in this messed up world. genuine people with good hearts and the best senses of humor. i thought i burned most bridges that mattered in life; but it appears that ive instead uncovered self-built bridges that have existed for years. nothings better than realized friendships among those who've been in your life since childhood.

side-splitting

for the past [insert inordinate amount of days here] ive been going to sleep exhausted. getting fit or whatever. work and work out and work and work out and work out and work out. this theory's all whacked, but im thinking that this is having a hand in the extreme amount of dreams ive been having. i say "theory's all whacked," cause im pretty sure exercise and exhaustion causes you to fall in a deeper sleep
.....whereamigoingwiththiswhereamigoingwiththis...
which means less time for REM? anyway, down below is a local singing talent show mimicking "Idol," which more or less is really screaming "amateur hour at your local mall." and while i cant see it in my head, there are probably 3 judges who favor the number 10 and 9.9, who are wishing they could go into the hundredths to make this a closer race than ever; giving the guy in last-place a slight ego boost for having lost by .08 of a point. wthever. and now i see that this isnt quite idol, but some other game show that wont even pretend that the thoughts of YOU, VIEWERS OUT THERE, actually matter. "What's a popular vote?" everyone loves idol; the only place where, supposedly, their opinion actually matters... cause lord knows more than 50% of the American population didnt vote for our current president....[insert quip about the long-lasting Sanjina here --i would, but i have not and do not follow 'idol'];

anyway,
im walking across the mall when i see an asian with a cell phone. we're walking towards the same destination and im thinking, "id like to get there first;" well, he's thinking the same thing. at almost the exact same moment we quickens our steps to the point where we're running. but not running. but running. swift bodies in motion. we saw it from afar, but then begin to notice a slow-moving round platform that appears to be about 6 feet away from the end of ours. 6 feet before she grabs my hand and tells me to jump. half-way through i realize that it's a little more than 6 feet, and we had a little less than 6 feet to begin with, and this isnt the first time, but expressions like "a little less" and "a little more" mean so much more now that all you have to do is land. he does, and i fall. i slam my hip on the ledge, never making it onto the platform. a girl i knew from highschool and her younger boyfriend run to me, and while i already feel as though i could, i "faint." except, in my head im saying, "this is me; fainting." im probably fine. im probably just laying there with my eyes closed. the only thing faint about me is my breathing. i open the corner of my eye to see if anyone else in the world is concerned and catch the asian with a cell phone still on the platform, idle in his self, but slow-moving.

and all im thinking is, that could be me right there. except i'd be doing it so much better.
i'd probably be dancing.

like,
i like it.

wutinda

wuh in daaaaaa

2 posts in one day; 2 posts within the same hour ?!
for shame !



i just wanted to leave this little treat cause i use him from time to time. im not quite sure where exactly i stole him from; all i know is that i put it in my own photobucket, so he's technically "mine." if "mine" means "stolen." anyway, he rubs his face and dances to any beat i drop, so that's love right there.
i wish i knew his origin, but im so unsure of what exactly he is (if he is in fact a "he") that im lost as to what key words id put into google.com/images.


for now, his name is faceface.gif. anyone who thinks otherwise can kiss my faceface.gif.

cause,
i like it !

day 1

today, i write for myself. right now im thinking about how im not going to advertise in any way that i have a blog. now im thinking about how i'd adertise my blog. that leads to me thinking about who exactly would read it. which turns into who exactly would want to read it? not me. probably not me. not even me in 2-years. now im thinking that im lying. as far as the general public, im not sure what the whole fascination about blogs, if not to see and then compare your mind with others. were i a photographer, id put some insanely amazing pictures of sunsets and kittens laughing, an interesting leaf, or a dirty wall. but im not, and its growing exceedingly difficult to find beauty in crap like that. just kidding. just kidding. just kidding, i love it. just kidding, im jealous. just kidding, you're thinking that im just jealous that im not a photogapher. well i am, but im also not. jealous, that is.

this first blog is supposed to determine what future posts will be like. this is kind of screaming 'lackluster !' and 'slightly confusing..' it's going to piss people of how i ignore general rules of grammar and syntax. it's going to piss people off more that i use run-on sentences and have very shallow views of the world, politics, and relationships.



but,
i like it !